I don't know when it started....

i have never even thought about blogging about this before... truthfully, when Iim not painful... mostly i forget about it... the pain. strange how that works... actually scares me, because i figure one day i will miss an important sign of some illness that will be much more problematic than forgetting to tell my doc that my gallbladder was going bad years ago... eventually, i got around to telling the doc... actually only after a friend had her gb out and then aw my symptoms and said "girl... you need that thing out!" she, of course was right... the first i remember about hte constant or intense muscle/tendon type pain was when it went away during my pregnancy with nick. i have no clue how ling i have been suffering with this other than to say at least since 2001... probably should have done something... i am also not sure how long i have been complaining to my doc about it.. probably should ask... but waht i know is that it is insidious... but then can disappear for days, occasionally weeks with no notice... prednisone helps for now... it gives me a few weeks of reprieve... but mostly i want to know what it is... i need a name... i have lost 50 pounds to date and feel good, have tons of energy most days... but when i do exercise or go hiking or do any exercise...wow do i pay... i might get away with a few workouts... but within the week... here comes the pain... i am not talking about workout pain... i am talking about muscles so sore it hurts to touch them.... not usually unbearable... but remember, i have a huge pain tolerence... so the most recent flare up started about 3 weeks ago... i have gone off milk... doesn't really help... i have gone off gluten... no big improvement... but may try this again... truth be told, it may not have been long enough... i do know that when my allergies flare, i will often have a flare... so i have known for a long time that it was inflamatory... but i still need a name... so i went today... doc is running a few more test.. but i think i need to see someone new... a new perspective... but this time... no mention of my perfession will be mentioned (at least in the beginning)... the scary thing is, i know my body... unlike anyone i have ever met... probably a combination of my knowledge, my sheer number of weird physical issues and my intuition... I can almost immediately feel inflamation, hormone surges, etc... i know days before my asthma flares...and yes, i start my meds... the hormones... well, can't do a darn thing about them except honor them... lovely thing, hormones... can't live with them.. won't get you off of a muder charge.... so the diagnosis... still awaits me... the most recent tests might finnaly push us in a good direction, or it may make things more mysterious.... the one test, may, if positive... show that i have a lack of some of the immune complexes... good i might have a diagnosis... bad i may be on shots for the rest of my life... it is a tade off... i probably have some weirdo disease that only men over 60 get.... and since i am a women under 45... they aren't even looking fo it... lol... thanks for listening... smooches...

It's Monday...

well, it's monday... not much going on... i worked this past weekend, felt like it went by pretty fast... then came monday... strange day, monday... for most people, it is the beginning of their work week, for me, the end... so, i am often very tired on monday... and have a bad case of friday-itis... but today i am not busy enough to be distracted from how tired i am... and at the same time, the thought of being too busy makes me more tired... but the sun is shining and i really want to be outside... but then i go out to lunch and remember how cold it is... strange day monday... full of kunundrums...
well here's to tuesday.. it will be warmer... hopefully the sun will be out... i will be off work... so maybe i might actually get enough sleep to be awake...
good-day.